EXTRANEOUS

'You really are a nice guy'

'You must have me confused..'

'Stop being modest, what you did was really nice'

'I dont think so, else I wouldn't have'

'You are such a curious fellow'

"You are kidding me'

'Am I bugging you ..?'

'Yes you are, didnt know how to say it earlier'

'Yeah right, and what will my Lord rather be doing?'

'Dont know what your Lord has to do now, but I've got some wanking to do'

You mean...! OMG, you cant be serious'

'You really are bent on being an irritant , aren't you?'

'But thats so self-demeaning..., how can you...you shouldn't'

Under the sofa, a 'dirty' Mag surfaces

The bathroom door closes'

<'Damn neighbour's sister'>

'

Thumbed thru some pages,

Eyes closed,

lubrication is in order

and the 'To' et 'Fro'

Felt the appendage touch something warm

Eyes opened

Sees the reflection in the medicine box mirror"

<'Father!', what great knockers...>"

Felt the cleavage assailing his back

The hand easing his off the woody

With alarmingly pleasurable pulsations.

''

He opens the medicine box

Out comes one from the pack of three...

This is definitely NOT the time for words.

'"

<'Who would have thought...!'>

TAKE A BREAK

Two guys in a life raft in the middle of the ocean

One sees an old bottle floating.

He picks it up and rubs it, and a genie comes out.
The genie says,

"For letting me out, I will grant you one wish."
The guy says, (without thinking)

"Turn thisocean into beer".

And the ocean turns into the best beer anybody has ever tasted.
The second guy says to the first,

"You idiot,now we'll have to piss in the boat"

...........................................................
What is the thinnest book in the world?
What men know about women

................................................

Q. How many times can you subtract the number 5from 25?
A. Only once, then you are subtracting it from 20

...............................................

Why don't blondes get coffee breaks at work?
Because retraining costs too much

.............................................................
Why did the blonde put lipstick on her forehead?
She wanted to Make-Up her mind

.....................................................

How many civil servants does it taketo change a light bulb?

45: One to change the bulb, and 44 to do thepaperwork

..........................

Before you find your handsome prince,

you've gotto kiss a lot of frogs

.....................

A man was walking along the beach and found abottle.

He looked around and didn't see anyone sohe opened it.

A genie appeared and thanked the manfor letting him out.

The genie said,

"For your kindness I will grant you one wish, but only one.

"The man thought for a minute and said,

"I havealways wanted to go to Hawaii

but have never been able to because

I'm afraid of flying and ships make me claustrophobic and ill.

So, I wish for aroad to be built from here to Hawaii."

The genie thought for a few minutes and said,

"No,I don't think I can do that.

Just think of all thework involved

with the pilings needed to hold upthe highway

and how deep they would have to be

to reach the bottom of the ocean.

Think of all thepavement that would be needed.

No, that's just too much to ask."
The man thought for a minute and then told the genie,

"There is one other thing that I havealways wanted.

I would like to be able tounderstand women.

What makes them laugh and cry,

why are they temperamental,

why are they sodifficult to get along with?

Basically, what makes them tick?"
The genie considered for a few minutes and said,

"So, do you want two lanes or four?".

...........................................

ONE LOVE

:-)

The Bargain Store

A friend has just been jilted by his fiancee for a richer guy-imagine!
When we were already rejoicing about the opportunity to 'partee'. (So much for our stupendous Bach-Eve. Okay o maybe I'll post the full story l8r)

Now I'm worried for my guy, he wants to go into the world with a vengeance.

There's so much hurt in the world; senseless hurt, yes.
The greatest tragedy , though, is when we keep re-feeling the hurt.

Today's Adonis may be tomorrow's Wonky and hurt us (or not). There is always a cycle of hurt to be broken by us all who have ever attempted love (or like..lol).

People get hurt and react in diverse ways.
Sometimes we say "Chei! I've learnt" "I no know how to deal with such and such".

Yeah right.

YOU ARE HURT and need to get rid of the hurt before you start liking someone else again.
ELSE? you'll be hurt again and it might just be your fault this time for not being whole before mingling again.

Dolly (God bless her and her ....), says it very well below.

The part that I think is most important in this song is the part of opening up, esp by someone who's been hurt before before, a la ..."...The bargain store is open, COME INSIDE".

One love...

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Artist: Dolly Parton
Album: Vol. 2-essential
Title: The Bargain Store


My life is like unto a bargain store
And i may have just what you're lookin' for
If you don't mind the fact that all the merchandise is used
But with a little mending it could be as good as new

Why you take for instance this old broken heart
If you will just replace the missing parts
You would be surprised to find how good it really is
Take it and you never will be sorry that you did

The bargain store is open come inside
You can easily afford the price
Love is all you need to purchase all the merchandise
And i will guarantee you'll be completely satisfied

Take these old used memories from the past
And these broken dreams and plans that didn't last
I'll trade them for a future, i can't use them anymore
I've wasted love but i still have some more

The bargain store is open come inside
You can easily afford the price
Love is all you need to purchase all the merchandise
And i can guarantee you'll be completely satisfied

My life is like unto a bargain store
And i may have just what you're lookin' for
If you don't mind the fact that all the merchandise is used
With a little mendin' it could be as good as new

The bargain store is open, come inside
The bargain store is open, come inside

(Dolly Parton-Copyrighted; Not for commercial use)