Tuesday, April 28, 2009

Shaggy and Sons- Mama Shaggy Visits2-The chronicles


We go to pick up mama Shaggy today at the park.
We take one last look around...

Flat neatly arranged-check
No stray playboy et al lying anywhere-check
All such publications as above moved outta the house-check
Christian picture on sitting room wall-check, check
Sticker on outer door saying 'I'm a winner'- double check

Bus arrives 3pm-we've been there since 2:30.
Her route is announced, we meet, we're introduced. I get special mention and hug as the 'landlord'
Did I mention the prayers too. We left early enof to avoid rush hour. We offer mama some re-heated food still in take away pack from TFC- (Yeah I know, we were just incorrigible)

She's appalled!

"Is this how you boys live?" she queries. We ALL shrug like whats she talking about?!

"Unacceptable", she declared, bringing out some pre-cooked stew +soup from used bournvita cans.

She empties these into our sole 2 pots and kept the rest in the refridgerator
"Tomorrow", she dictated 'we go to the market'
"Yes ma", we nodded obediently, .
Secretly patting each other on the back-'high performance, delivered-great planning guys'
She wisks some dinner up for the boyz and goes to sleep after a bath.

...Mouths reeking of locust beans, tummies rotund from myriads of boluses, we sit idly in the sitting room, legs draped over various pieces of furniture, wondering if we could have mama on retainership.

Plates washing and kitchen cleaning, we sleep and thus went the first day


Ps: OMG, None of us remembered it was a Friday night…


Day 2

Bodyclock ALWAYS wakes me at 5am. Prompt!
At about 'wake up time', my mind registered a shuffling past our door. I was sleeping on the rug; nearer to the door and could make out mutterings. Mama was up, about and praying. I smiled, nostalgia, I'm suddenly thinking of my mum. *sigh
Call Mama Mancee in the morn

Morning rituals-water drinking, 'shaiting', pushups, crunches, bathing. I launch 'operation 'MEGA SUCK UP' and join mama Shaggy in the kitchen.

She's pleasantly surprised to see me.

I asked if she slept well, 'very well' she said. She fired me some early morn prayers while I lapped it all up...


She asked about the others, told her they were still dozing. I saw her brief look of dis-approval as she glanced at the kitchen clock 5:45.

We chit chat about this and that-me being careful NOT to be drawn into any 'churchy' conversation except to mention my mum and her churchy ways...Mama is impressed.
Man, have I scored or what? I can already see the size of MY meat growing as we chatted. lol.

The more we talked, the more I wondered how it was that Shaggy was born of this same woman !!! The more I saw the potential for this visit going wrong. Wharaheck! I decided to focus on the potential gratification at hand.

Tis Saturday, I had to go to the office. ( actually Salir and I had scheduled to be away today to avoid possibly going to the market with her, *snicker). Shaggy of course couldn’t be away.

We had told him it would be quality time to catch up on Mama-Son gist. The look on his face was priceless…he looked like he had just been pierced in the heart and the lance was being twisted back and forth. lol

Breakfast was better than dinner, I swear! Jeez, I could get used to this.
Of course, we’ll be back in time for lunch.
Of course.

Chic I marry MUST know how to cook first, a close second being shag-ability...(we'll need plenty work outs to keep the pot belle at bay, innit?)



  1. lol.....sticky on the door that says 'i'm a winner'..lol

  2. lol christian picture, i am a winner sticker..

    after all those talk of course your meat will elongate..lol

    i can see everything is going as planned.

  3. u guys are crazy, let's see how long the 'good biys' stan will last. mama shaggy will sniff u guys out soon.

  4. Lol mad shidren!!!
    Enjoy your food cos it will soon come to an end.
    But Mama shaggy is making me really and truely miss my mom.

  5. haha @ I'm a winner sticker and size of your meat. hm, your morning ritual is rather extensive - good to see water drinking thrown in there. I agree with Phoenix, i miss my mom now. you had better learn some kitchen skils from mama shaggy.

  6. u r really good in the mega sucking up business o..ahnahn

    lmao @ the 2nd memo to self..u r somn else..lol..

  7. Well Peeps,
    You cant blame these brodas...
    if you knew how much we had "invested" in eateries and bukas...Men! We should be like major shareholders or something.
    In fact I suspect that when we moved outta that area, the joint eatery community's turnover nose dived.

    @ Pheonix + OmoOba,
    Call her up. ASAP
    DOnt mince words...Say you missed her even if she'll end up yabbing you. Good luck

    Thanx y'all

  8. lol, have i missed or what?!
    lemme go catch up!

  9. loool!
    The size of your meat growing bigger?

  10. ahem...... passed catering school with flying colors, and i have a leather bound well-worn copy of the Karma Sutra >cough, cough< just putting it out there.......

  11. See this chic o...
    swotting Karma Sutra and not jumping in the river to get 'wet' (pun sooo intended)
    "DO not be the swotters only but doers also" *wink*
    ps: funny enof, I've always had a hardtime convincing ppl that that volume is more than just sex...theres also the Darma and Artha b4 the pleasure, shay?

  12. darn it u got me lol! i only own it cuz i collect classics. wetin dey do u sef! ruining a good come hither :(

  13. >>inco
    EVER gotten round to reading ur volume yet?


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