Monday, April 20, 2009

Shaggy and Sons...Mama Shaggy Visits (1)

Shaggy's mum once came visiting! Apparently, the woman had not seen him for while and was missing her son. Nothing wrong with that shay?
Well so we thot till the 'logistics' dawned us.
Salir randomly asked if we needed to 'prepare' for mumsie's coming and the thot appealed to my 'inner consultant', so I fired up my laptop, hooked the display up to our 25"tv nd commenced deliberations.
(1)House keeping
(2)Bedroom space
(3)Tour packages
(4)Tv programmes scheduling and how they affect Video Gaming
(5)Parties/Gigs scheduled 4 that week

Soo, housekeeping.
It was obvious that our bi-weekly pseudo cleaning effort wont fly. To our credit, we had a timetable, we cleaned every other saturday . Why we didnt do it more often? We all agreed that the important thing was the regularity. Salir NEVER faltered. I've been known to have a few excuses but Shaggy ALWAYS had his done.
By different chics.
After which, he - in his words- rewards them.
In kind of course.
He called it a 'classic symbiosis'.
Needless to say , Shaggy's Super Saturdays were our cleanest, of cos he'd claim the bragging rights too-fair enof.
He however, made up for this by being the most untidy of us three.
Yours truly was "Cleanest" (lol) male standards.

The resolution here was obvious-
Henceforth, cleaning is every saturday. Every saturday is Shaggy's Super Saturday- for a month before his mum's coming. Upon her arrival, we guys will take over. No more chics allowed.

Bedroom space. This was a no brainer-She gets one room, we guys hunker in the other room and spill over into the sitting room-as usual.

Sight seeing tours. We agreed that to keep the Ol lady out of our biz, we needed diversions. She needed tours such that she'll be too tired in the evenings to bother us all too much. We were especially scared of being preached at. Of cos, Shaggy's trips had to be on hold, else the stupid boy would have conveniently structured a week long facility inspection to some remote location or the other. Plan was we'll take turns and of cos, we all had to go to a church with her. We agreed my church was the preferable, it was big enof for us to claim anonymity and I had attended church enof to be known by a handful of ppl who we could stop and make small talk with after church to simulate 'after service fraternization'. I could see the Ol lady's nod of approval already...(snicker)

TV. If above tours plans dont work out...we all knew what that meant, the tv would be 'in the line of fire'. She was liable to hold us ransom to some local boring programme or the other OR even more scary, we could be made to watch an online church service with her. With this in mind, I installed an application on my phone which would 'call' me at a set time so I'll pretend to need to go outside to talk. No, I ddnt mention it to them-if we all had it, its efficacy very easily be compromised. There was the suggestion of buying a tv for her room so she wont come out at all. Shaggy reminded us that she was waay too social for that to work. Plonck! There goes another great idea down the drain... (sigh).
Video games were definitely NOT going to fly...we evaluated them and ALL was 18+. Too much gore or too much display of 'chic-ly anatomy'

Parties and gigs were out of it. You DONT want to provoke a Christ Apostolic Church woman into forcing you to a night vigil session. NO SIR! you absolutely DONT.

For above reason, visits were to be AGGRESIVELY monitored and censored.
Of cos, NO MORE CHICS' SLEEP OVER. Shaggy muttered something about feelings of 'castration'.
Lol. This was going to be fun.
I mentioned I was looking forward to seeing Shaggy go thru withdrawal symptoms.
He looked like he wanted to call the trip off, say he had to travel outta town or something. Problem was, we ALL wanted the woman over!!!

Then you'll rightly ask
So with ALL these potential disruption to our 'well structured and organised lives' Why didnt we just vote the proposed visit down?

Well...because we are guys and though it is often opined that the path to the male heart is sometimes the **** (cough), believe me, the palate is always a winner.

Home cooked mealies, done by a real life old dame? I'm sorry but few chics can cook the way our mamas do it...

We were all agreed on that one.


  1. First!!!
    I knew that was the reason you guys wanted her to come!!
    Lmao, good luck men!!
    Seems like b4 her trip ends some James Bond moves would have ensued.
    Make sure you record all the gist and spilla t the appropriate time.

  2. at withdrawal symptoms!!na wa oh! and thanks for checking out my blog,ill add u to my bloglist

  3. all these "strategic planning" all cos of the palate? you dont know that awoof dey run belle? , lol

  4. @Phoenix,
    WHAT?! you read minds?
    All in good time, sweetie.

    Turns out we bit off a lil more than we could
    Tanx for stopping by.

    @ Bumight,
    Run belle ke? You can say that again.
    But with a Doc in the house...I'll just use it as an excuse for 'private consultation'.

  5. lol you guyz are funny.. i guess it is worth the trouble.

    lol eya poor shaggy. That phone application thing is not bad o...

    i remember when i use to stay with my brothers off camp, lord have mercy. Well boys must be boys

    thanks for stopping by. i'm liking your blog already :)

  6. lol you are omni multitude indeed..

  7. lol@chicly anatomy. u guys are crazzzy! ehn, see preparation all for the palate. na u biko.

  8. That was hilarious....
    But hey if it's all for the cooking, i don't blame y'all!

  9. @ BSNC,
    Thanks for coming. The phone app...there's something similar on, tis called "CallCheater manager" and java-based. if you need help with it...holla.

    @Omo Oba,
    No blame us now...One can only wolf down so much of Mr Biggs , TFC et al. Shay? ;-)

    lol...wetin men for do now? A good cook just always wins.

    ps: have you listened to Koffi's mama's kitchen song in his album 'Abinibility?'. You should. Funny piece.

    Thank y'all for loking this way. Much 'ppreciated.

  10. u guys are crazy, i know boys would be boys tho. The last time my mum, nephew & I visted my brother his room was well cleared up but unfortunately for him my lil nephew found his stash of lubes, condoms etc under d bed,

    The lil boy tot the lubricant was a cream and had already to some on his face. Lol, thankfully mumsy was glued to the tv and didnt know wats up.

    Thanks for stopping by mine.

  11. lol @ jayla's comment, tehehe.
    ManCee, u are not normal o. Dont be deceived by any passion-somethings...for all u know, i can be an Ajegunle babe writing from a cafe or that ex u want to hate...woof! lol

  12. cannot beat a mother's home cooking...i bet you guys will be at least 5 kg heavier by the time she leaves

    i remember staying at my ex's and when his mom was coming see serious cleaning...i just used to stand aside...cos was on another level...

    lmao @ plonck...if she is way 2 social to watch tv in her room all the time maybe she might watch it some of the might be worth a purchase afterall...if not for her then for u guys so you can play video games in one of your rooms

  13. @jayla,
    God bless the tube for averting a tsunami caused by

    @Omo Oba,
    Of cos, we no well.
    BTW, thot I mentioned I had a soft core for AJ-city flavored chics

    Nice thot there. Frankly, benefit of hindsight, I think our inner chealskates were worried about ownership of the TV after the mama leaves...

    Tanx Y'all

  14. why am i just finding this blog? because like bumight and tigress said - i'm a sporadic blogger!

    i love this blog... hopefully i will be back... i like the way pictures spring up in my mind as you write... mama shaggy's room has been cleaned - check... lmao! your blog rocks mancee!

  15. Hey Tyger,
    ...Better sooner than later , shay?
    The ManCee appreciates ur visit

    And like they say on those carrier bags...

  16. hehehe!

    crazy bunch..

    i love the idea of that phone app tho..u might wanna hook a sister up for future purposes.. :D

  17. ButterCup

    The phone app...there's something similar on, tis called "CallCheater manager" and java-based. if you need help with it...dont be a stranger...holla.

  18. LMAO! OMG u r hilarious!
    See the way u went in to detail plannin her arrival!

  19. lol i live alone and i'm a girl and trust me when my mom informed me of her plan to visit i came early from work and CLEANED. i took down dirty posters, changed the screensaver on my laptop n put away all my video games, 90 % of my dvd. then i drove around til i knew how to get to the nearest church and back like i'd been doing it for ages. and heck yes my MUMMY cooked. first order of business was to tk her grocery shopping then i let her loose. i took food to work, had dinner hot and waiting when i got back.... ah bliss :)

  20. >>BrokeAss
    What wont men do for some correct female spoiling? eh?

    You are living the 'married man's' life eh?
    Should we be worried?

  21. ha ha now that u say it that way......i did live that life 4 a few days huh. complete with the no sex at night ha ha

  22. lol
    No sex at night...thats one bat-shit scary part of the marriage myth.
    ps: How would YOU know allof that?
    OMG! You had a sex change op!?


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